
| You know, I've been trying to live every moment in the moment. I was in the shower the other day when it hit me like a brick. I was standing there, water beating down on me, and I had no feeling. I didn't even feel the water. See, I was too worried about what might happen at work. I was worried about how I was going to work all the extra hours and still remain sane. Will it be crazy busy or will we actually have a chance to clean out the email? Will the web orders backup? Will chat be covered well? Every time I worry about what will be or what has been I'm giving those things more power than I should. I'm taking a ten hour work day and turning into an eleven hour day because in my mind I'm already dealing with it even if I'm not there yet. My brain doesn't react any differently when I'm actually there or I'm just thinking about it. |

| Buy On |
When we interact with people we need to be fully connected to that moment. If I spend the time that I have with my son worrying about all the what-ifs, I'm not spending time with him. I am cheating both of us. When I'm with my son, my job is to be all those wonderful things that fall under the mother umbrella. When I'm with one of my girlfriends my job is to be a wonderfully connected friend. My job isn't to worry about how I'll pay the cable bill. As I drive to work my job is not to worry about if I'll spend the rest of my life alone. My job is to look at the earth and take pleasure and awe in everything that just is. All of those little things grace my existence. The sun, moon, mountains, trees, plants, wild flowers….. Even though the wild chicory is gone I swear that I can still sometimes see it. When it snows I need to take pleasure in it rather than worrying for an hour about the drive to work. I need to look out my window and enjoy the flight of a bird rather than getting lost in something I did wrong last week. Don't get me wrong, it's a lot harder than it sounds. I have to make a genuine effort to accomplish it even on a semi-consistent basis. When was the last time you picked up a cup and actually took a moment to focus on the feeling of it against your hand? When was the last time you typed on your keyboard and felt the stroke of your fingers as they touched the keys? When was the last time you felt your own hair as it brushed against your cheek? When was the last time you felt the pillow against your cheek? When was the last time that you had some time of your very own? When was the last time you took a walk in nature? When was the last time you seen the world through some famous photographers lens and wished that you had a camera? When was the last time you did something that seemed embarrassing but did it anyway because it made you feel fabulous? It could be dancing around your living room like a crazy person with Beethoven blaring. It could be cleaning your house buck naked. It could be singing karaoke horribly. It could be pulling over on the side of the road to take a photo of a beautiful little blooming something that is more than likely some kind of weed. It could be swimming in your bra and underwear in a hotel because, "Hey, they look very similar to a bikini, right?" When was the last time you sat outside on your porch to take in a wild storm or the roaring sound of the wind as it madly whooshed past you? Just saying. Cindy Callinsky |
